Archive | December, 2013

battle of the butt

21 Dec

“What do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas?” I asked the kids as we crept along in rush hour traffic.

“I want a remote controlled car,” said Gabriel.

“A remote controlled car? That sounds cool. How about you Sof-”

“And I want it to have jets on it with rocket boosters!” Gabriel continued excitedly.

“Oh. Okay,” I said, not sure if a car like that exists in the $10 range that Santa gave me.

“And wings! So it can fly!” He exclaimed. Oh geez.

“Um, so you want a remote controlled car with jets and rocket boosters and wings so it can fly?” I asked scratching my head.

“Yep.” He said confidently.

Well…shit. Santa’s going to have to get creative this year. “Okay,” I said hesitantly. Slightly afraid to continue the conversation, I turned my attention to my daughter and asked “Sofia, what do you want for Christmas?”

“I want a big booty,” Sofia said proudly. Continue reading